Katie and Teresa take a walk down the aisle

From Katie and Andrew Koetsier's wedding, July 25, 2009

Make Friends with a Lonely Atheist

This morning I read a story about atheists who have decided that atheism should be more than a stance, it should be a cause they promote. I can understand them doing this because atheism must be a lonely experience, all in all. They naturally would like to build around themselves a community of others who feel the way they do.

Who wants to be the only one in his neighborhood with his fingers in his ears, shouting "blah, blah, blah" at all the stuff about God that surrounds him and his family? It would be so much more comforting to take the kids to atheist camp and sing songs of free thought around the campfire, songs like "Don't kum byah, non-existent Lord, don't kum byah".

The most interesting thing I saw in the article was words that are on a billboard the atheists put up. It said,

"Being a good person doesn't require God.

Don't believe in God?

You're not alone!"

I would dispute the "not alone" part because I think that not believing in God probably leads to loneliness on a profound and cosmic level. However, much more interesting and thought-provoking to me is the question of what they mean by "good person". By what standard do they evaluate what a good person is? I think they would probably point to the good works they do, but why are those considered good?

I went to an atheists' website and saw lots of pictures of atheists picking trash up by the highway and going on walks for cancer cures. Why is that good? It looks like a lot of time-wasting, sweaty activity that leads to sore muscles. Yet they believe they are good people who don't need God because they do these things that benefit other people.

How did that standard for good come to be? It must have come from someplace outside of themselves because left to themselves with no outside influences to make them think better of it, people generally would not put on a silly orange vest and stab filthy trash all day while cars rushed by just inches from their elbows. Yet, there they are in the picture with piles of black trash bags in front of them.

If I could sit one of those good atheists down and have a friendly talk, I would ask her where she got her idea of "good". She might attribute it to the general knowledge that all people have in their hearts about what is right or wrong. She might say that over the course of human evolution people have learned what works and what doesn't for our survival. Doing nice things for each other contributes to the perpetuation of the species. But why care about that if we all only have one shot at life? Who cares about the perpetuation of the species? Once an atheist's life has poofed out, why would she care if even the whole world comes to an end?

I think that my hypothetical atheist friend probably does good works, not to help perpetuate the species, but out of concern for the quality of her own life. Maybe she lives in fear; fear of being ostracized from other people, fear of not being remembered well, fear of bad "karma". The very thing she criticizes God-believers for doing, acting out of fear (in this case, of God), is what she does.

No matter who is determining what is "good", good has to be measured by some set of standards. Unfortunately for atheists, the generally agreed upon standards were first recorded a long time ago in the Bible. In fact, they were recorded so long ago, so early in human experience, they didn't have time to evolve with the species. The most sophisticated and perfect instructions in good behavior were originally handed down to tribal people who were "not a people" yet. The Israelites, who became a "people" as a result of the laws they received. Then they published the law of their God, the world had its standards for goodness.

It is hard on atheists to try and prove they are good without God. Any good thing they can think of to do, He already thought up. He authored the Book of Goodness. So, maybe they can be good people and pretend the Book is useless and the Author isn't there, but it seems silly. Most of us know better than to think up something that doesn't exist and spend our lives protesting and trying to demonstrate its non-existence.

If there is a very high percentage of the populationwho claim to have a personal relationship with God, and their claims have persisted since the dawn of time, there may be something to it. My sympathies go out to atheists who disagree so vehemently with those claims. It is hard to keep on saying to believers "No, you don't have a relationship with God. He doesn't exist!" and then have them all look back at you like you are crazy.

No wonder they're lonely.

Healthy Food?

This is the carrot I could not eat for lunch today. ..too much like a severed finger. It went straight to the compost pile.

ACT-ion Figures

I saw this on the plane from Chicago to Denver. It's quite amazing and it made me think of my action figure loving family members. Very interesting story.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZGZZlM-AJo

Happy Birthday, Matt!

Matthew's birthday is today and we got to go and celebrate by having brunch with him and Stephanie at La Note in Berkeley. Mmmm...they know so many wonderful places to eat.

In fact, Matt knows so much about so many things that I count on him to bring me up to date on all the things I need to know. He sees what is happening the world and puts his observations to work, seeing patterns and developing trends across the globe. He is always ahead of the curve of emerging technology, but he also sees the direction corporations and governments are going and is incredible at predicting outcomes. He is an "early adopter" of new technology and always ready to maximize its uses, but he is also an accurate analyst when it come to understanding the weaknesses in that technology. He is amazing! Time with Matt always leaves me staggered by the insights he has into what is happening in the world today.

However, Matt's greatest virtues lie not with his intellectual brilliance, but with what you see in his face in these pictures. He is a loving man with a devoted wife. He is fiercely loyal to all of the people he cares about, whether they are family or friends (he said he would "kill" for his niece Susannah should she ever need his services as a bodyguard). He is generous and loving.

He is passionate about the things that matter to him--politically, socially and especially in matters of justice--but people matter to him more than anything else. Even stupid people matter to him because every person, like every event in the news, is part of the whole pattern of life. Matt wants us all to get up to speed and work together for good outcomes. I am very proud to be his mother.

Here is a birthday prayer for Matthew:

May the coming year be Matt's year to shine--

more than ever before!

May he find success and prosperity in every part of his life.

May all of his dreams come true

and may this be his happiest year of his life.

God bless my son, Matthew.

Amen.

Poems for My Mom and Dad

Here are two poems I framed for my mom and dad's anniversary gift:

A Great Man and His Heart
If these walls could talk,
they would speak of a man
Who has worked with great heart
To accomplish his plan.
They’d speak of the times
That he’s prayed in the night
For the strength to go on
And to do what is right.

They’d speak of sweet moments
Of laughter and fun,
The times with his children,
His love for each one.
Oh, if they could talk,
It would just be the start
Of a story of love,
A great man and his heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are All the Children In?
I think oft-times as the night draws nigh
Of an old house on the hill.
Of a yard all wide and blossom-starred
Where the children played at will.
And when the night at last came down,
Hushing the merry din,
Mother would look around and ask,
“Are all the children in?”

‘Tis many and many a year since then,
And the old house on the hill
No longer echoes to childish feet,
And the yard is still, so still.
But I see it all, as the shadows creep,
And though many the years have been
Since then, I can hear mother ask,
“Are all the children in?”

I wonder if when the shadows fall
On the last short, earthly day,
When we say good-bye to the world outside,
All tired with our childish play,
When we step out into that Other Land
Where mother so long has been,
Will we hear her ask, just as of old,
“Are all the children in?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The poem for my dad was on a card my sister gave him some years ago. The poem for Mom is one she often mentions to me. It reminds her of her own mother who literally spent the last 45 minutes of her life praying that all of her children, grandchildren and the succeeding generations would make it home to Heaven and be with her.

60 Years of Life and Love

Vern and Wilma Carson's 60th anniversary party, July 4th, 2009

July 9, 1949, my mom and dad got into my dad's car and started a drive to Lake Tahoe for a romantic honeymoon. Along the way they stopped at a little Baptist church in Lodi, California, where they found the pastor in his study preparing his sermon for the next day. They asked if he would marry them and he agreed as long as they would bring along a couple of witnesses. They hurried back to collect my Aunt Doris and her husband Fran and then got married at 4:00 p.m. The two couples went out to dinner, after which they parted company so that Mom and Dad could get on to that honeymoon. Somewhere there is an old scrapbook that has photos from that week of happiness. It's black background pages are illustrated with white ink Dad used to depict the beautiful moonlight they saw dancing on the lake each night.

I think they might have had the right idea; keep the ceremony brief and save your energy for the honeymoon.

Now they have been married for 60 years. Some people might have doubted whether a marriage that started so impulsively, between a 16 year old and a 20 year old, could last, but they have beaten the odds. They have not only stayed together for six decades, they have loved each other vigorously through all of them. Even now they celebrate their love every day. It is the centerpiece of their home and life together, the source of the peace and harmony they live in and the wellspring of much of the laughter they share. Visitors can't be around them very long without seeing that these two people love each other very much.

My parents have shown me how to get through life. They have known extreme grief as well as extreme joy. They have been forced to press on through countless challenging circumstances and they have stayed together, working as a team even when they weren't sure what to do next. Their pattern has been to move closer to each other whenever circumstances threatened to blast them apart.

They have been loved, admired, taken for granted and, yes, aggravated by their big family over the years. Their response to conflict has been to re-establish loving relationships as quickly as they could. They believe family is meant to be together and they can't rest when there is any kind of separation. They love having their family together. They think and talk about each family member so much that all of us are actually present with them every day. They fret over the ones they don't see or hear from often enough. They worry and pray. They also brag and speak with amazement about how remarkable they think each of us is.

There is not enough room here for me to talk about how much I have learned from my parents and how richly they have blessed my life. They are present in every part of me. I don't like to think that there will ever be a time when I have to travel through life without them. When they leave for Heaven I know that some of the wind that has filled my sails is going to die away.

I am grateful for every day that I have with them. Visiting them is always a joyful homecoming for me, a return the rich environment that gave me my start in life. We laugh together, we tell stories and catch up on the news; sometimes we cry and pray together. We look at old and new pictures and revisit old and new memories. I can never get enough of it.

I wish my mom and dad a happy anniversary this July 9. I hope they have many more, but I am glad to have shared this one with them and seen the joy and contentment of their faces as they gazed upon the family gathered around them. I saw that they were indeed blessed--by those to whom they have been a tremendous blessing.